The Change I Wasn’t Expecting

To begin this story, I must first give you some background information. I have been dating my boyfriend, Greg, for just over 4 years. We met in college and were in a long distance relationship for the early part of our relationship. A year and a half in and after I graduated college, I moved to a new town where he resided. After living alone my first year, we moved in together.

Fast forward to another year, and I am lying in bed one morning while Greg gets ready for work. He seems to be in a kind of bad mood but I try and lighten him up anyhow. I can sense that something amiss. I ask him what’s wrong. He hesitates and hesitates, clearly having some reservations about what to say. Meanwhile, my heart is pounding and I am getting nervous. Finally, he says he thinks we should just be friends.

Now, mind you, its the morning and he has to go off to work. Clearly not the time to be having a discussion. I ask him why and he doesn’t really respond. Then I tell him we can talk about it later when he gets home from work.

We didn’t.

Strangely enough, the next week goes by okay. Things seem to be alright between us.

Until exactly a week after his first admission of friendship, we have the same type of morning. He goes into discussing a little more as to why. Apparently I am not friendly enough towards his family and he’s afraid I’ll end up like my parents – blah, blah, blah. All are complete assumptions that are untrue. If he knew me at all, he would know that I am a little shy and I have tried my very best to be conversational towards his parents that I don’t exactly have much in common with. Not to mention the fact that I am like neither of parents and have been trying very hard to overcome their personality traits that I do not want as my own.

Nonetheless, he seems to have no regards to even discussing my side or of actually finding resolution. We decide to discuss it later.

Again, we didn’t.

And again, things seemed to go along okay over the next week. But things are still off. For whatever reason, I don’t know maybe he’s bipolar, we seemed to have days that were great. We got along and things were fine. And then a sudden shift and he acts like he wants nothing to do with me.

At this point, I’m completely defeated. He obviously has no intention of actually working through our problems and discussing the issues and finding resolutions. I decide it’s now a waste of my time.

I don’t say anything or make any final decision. But before bed one night, he says again that he just wants to be friends. I tell him, don’t worry, I’m already planning on finding an apartment and moving out.

And just like that, I realize that 4 years of being with someone I truly thought I would spend the rest of my life with, and my world starts crashing down around me.

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